In the Buddhist teaching, Upajjhatthana Sutta, there are five remembrances for contemplation. The one I…
People love to know stuff. Not just know it but we want to show what we know. We want to explain processes, steps, and requirements, among other things, in great detail. Sometimes too much detail.
I was a judge for a competition this weekend. The point of which was to show knowledge and to successfully help another person while meeting the requirements of the office. Some of the competitors were very successful at explaining the process to the client. Others were very successful at putting the client at ease but missed some important requirements. Neither of these approaches was inherently wrong but what they have in common is too many words.
Sometimes, in our eagerness to connect with others, we throw everything at it. Offering an opinion or thought where it is more confusing than helpful. Perhaps, stating so much information, so quickly, that it cannot be retained by the listener. Or, focusing on something in a conversation that interests us, whether or not it is important to others in the discourse.
These are just a few examples. What they have in common is that they all involve more speaking than listening. More ‘noise’ than space to think.
At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter how much you know or how much you can show. It matters if you are heard and understood. It matters if you pursue your goal in a way that is satisfying to the room. And it matters if your intention is understanding rather than display.
This disruption requires you to create more space for those things. To breathe fully, and allow thinking time into your conversations. Try this and let know how it goes.
Gina Razón is the Founder and CEO at GROW Voice LLC, a full-service verbal communication studio in Boston’s Back Bay. She has over two decades of experience as a teacher of voice and speech, is a communication and change facilitator, and is a voraciously curious voice user. Gina has worked professionally as a classical singer for over a decade and more recently as a professional public speaker. For more information on the studio or to book Gina visit www.growvoice.com.